Good morning 🐣

Check out days one and two if you missed ’em.

Now we come to the real heart of this year’s Christmas Shrektacular.

Previously in the Shrekverse: Shrek, an ogre living on his own, free from society, is forced to engage with the world when the evil Lord Farquaad pushes the fairy-tale creatures he despises out of his kingdom and into Shrek’s swamp. Shrek selfishly volunteers to complete a quest for Farquaad so that he can get his swamp back all to himself, but in the process makes friends, finds true love, and breaks free from his rigid definitions of the world and how he relates to it. The fairy-tale creatures reclaim their homes and everyone lives happily ever after.

Now married and returning from their honeymoon, Shrek (Mike Myers) and Fiona (Cameron Diaz) are pushed further outside their comfort zones in “Shrek 2” in a riff on “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner” with Shrek taking the place of Sidney Poitier. (Yes, Shrek taking the place of Sidney Poitier.) Fiona wants to get her parents’ blessing, but Shrek is putting up a big roadblock:

Shrek: “Who said I want to be part of this family?”

Fiona: “Uh, you did! When you married me!”

That’s a big ol’ duh, Shrekkie-poo. But he assumes her parents won’t like him, so he takes a potion to make himself look human, which is what he thinks Fiona wants. He gets some rugged good looks — I mean that JAWLINE — but obviously it’s not what she actually wants. Just like with Jesse and Céline in “Before Midnight,” Shrek’s not actually listening; he’s just mansplaining. Her dad pulls the same crazy kinda stunts. They both do it out of love for her, but it’s a hot mess.

And to be honest, Shrek’s not totally paranoid here. Fiona’s parents, the king and queen of Far Far Away (voiced by John Cleese and Julie Andrews), are shocked by their appearance. Daddy has especially strong stereotypes of ogres; I mean he locked his own daughter in a tower for crying out loud. But echoing the theme of the first film, King Harold is actually a frog prince (sorry SPOILER); he felt he had to hide his true self to be “the man his wife deserves.”

Meanwhile, Fairy Godmother (Jennifer Saunders) knows EXACTLY who her son, Prince Charming (Rupert Everett), is and accepts him for it. She gets this grown man a kids meal at the drive-thru.

The whole movie is about parenting, family relations, sacrifice, and hypocrisy — trying to make your children’s lives better than your own, but sometimes screwing it all up in the process.

Donkey (Eddie Murphy) and new cultural obsession Puss in Boots (Antonio Banderas) also find the true meaning of family along the way. But nobody personifies this more than the Gingerbread Man. When we meet Gingy in the first “Shrek,” he’s being tortured by Lord Farquaad to narc on the Muffin Man’s wife. Gingy’s legs are broken off and paraded in front of him as his tormentors mimic his signature line, “You can’t catch me. I’m the Gingerbread Man.” Thankfully his legs have since been reattached via icing, as one does.

Voice actor Conrad Vernon (who also directed the movie!), portrays Gingy as a little freak who prefers TV shows like “Wheel of Torture” and “K.N.I.G.H.T.S.” (a la “C.O.P.S.”). But his sadism is balanced out by his sheer devotion to others, to something greater than himself. As we discussed yesterday, Gingy’s new home is destroyed by Shrek’s high-speed chase in “The Ghost of Lord Farquaad,” but by “Shrek 2” he’s not only forgiving, he leads a daring “Mission: Impossible”-style breakout to rescue Shrek.

To continue the rescue operation, he then heads to the Muffin Man, the cozy Dr. Frankenstein that created him, a father figure of sorts. The Muffin Man cooks up a giant, childlike, gingerbread Godzilla named Mongo, who finds beauty and joy in everything he sees. “Go, Mongo! Go!” says Gingy with love and encouragement. When Mongo’s arms break off due to scalding cauldrons of milk, Gingy makes a daring leap to save him without even thinking of himself. Mongo, sinking into the water, tells Gingy: “Be good.” Sobbing, Gingy cries out, “He needs me! Let me go!” as Puss in Boots holds him back.

He needs me.

Let me go.

Be good.

Be Gingy.

We last see him dancing with Tinker Bell — and boy he’s earned it.

But this all raises one important question: Just who is the Muffin Man? We clearly see now why Lord Farquaad was so desperate to find him in the first film. This man has a great, uncanny power. He’s an enigma, potentially the mastermind behind the greater rebellion. A puppet master pulling all the strings who can bring pastries to life and of monstrous proportions.

We’ve finally met him, but do we ever truly KNOW the Muffin Man? CAN we know him?

Do we ever know any of our parents?

See you tomorrow! 💚